I think it's getting to me: being totally isolated in a piano practice room for hours every day. Maybe that's why I can't get the embellishments in my Haydn Sonata right. Maybe it's all in my head. Maybe that's why it's so hard to motivate myself, to focus, to practice.
The weather these past two days has been amazing. I love it when the temperature starts to change. It will still be a while until the season settles in and remains, but I love the hints that winter is coming. Still, it has been harder to enjoy it for some reason. I feel somewhat apathetic about...everything. The weather, piano, homework...
I also have yet to find those life-long friends everyone promises you before you get to college. "Oh, the friends you make in the next four years are the best friends you'll ever have! They're the frinds you'll keep for the rest of your life." It takes time. I know it does. The upper classmen say so. My high school friends say so. It's just mildly frustrating, waiting around. I know they're there somewhere, and I want to find them now! I feel like I'm wasting time that I could be spending with important people that I haven't met yet. Or maybe I've met them and just didn't recognize them yet.
Also, much of the exploration is over now. Auburn is becoming familiar. I'm finding a routine, and therefore I'm losing much of the passion. I've fallen into a rut, a muddy rut, and I'm getting bogged down.
I'll make it. But today everything feels impossible.
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