Life More Abundantly

Despite the situation with my great-grandmother (who has not adjusted well to the nursing home and seems to be in a perpetually bad mood) and some other set-backs this past month, I feel like I've been showering in blessings.

I found an email today.

Dear Nina,

I would like to enthusiastically congratulate you on your acceptance
into the Auburn University Piano Studio. Your audition last Saturday
was one of my favorites, for several reasons.

First of all, I think you underestimate your skills as a pianist and
musician! Your technical apparatus is very natural, and your playing
is so musical. Your teacher has clearly done some excellent work with
you - please congratulate her for me.

Also, I was extremely impressed by your maturity and honesty in the
brief time that we had to talk during your audition. You brought up
some very valid points and we appreciated the fact that you had
obviously thought about this "next step" quite carefully. I am truly
confident that you would be a successful double-major candidate, and I
think you would fit in very well as a student within the music
department.

It was wonderful to meet and hear you. All the best,

Assistant Professor of Piano


Let me tell you guys a little story. It might sound strange, but here's the truth of the matter. Last fall, I prayed for humility, and God answered. I was in the car when I realized why I was suddenly struggling so much with this one song on the piano. My tears of frustration turned to laughter. So then I changed my prayer. I asked God to help me surrender this, my music, my piano, fully to Him. And to help me learn this song. And He came through. My piano teacher had suggested putting words to the melody so I could sing along in my head as I played. I chose this verse:

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me and I will answer you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29:11-13

Anyway, that worked and I learned it. And all this time I've been praying for guidance about college (isn't this verse so fitting?) . I had kind of planned to go to a Florida school, but neither of my options really impressed me. Well, God provided majorly. He pointed out a school I hadn't even considered and provided the financial means to get there. It just fell into my lap, neatly wrapped and labeled "To Nina, with love. From your Heavenly Father."

Meanwhile, I was excited about the opportunity, but despairing because this college does not accept music minors. And the idea of not continuing to study music seemed incredibly tragic to me. The piano professor emailed me, telling me if I wanted to audition anyway, I should show up March 6 at 1:15. I almost didn't go, but then I realized the only thing holding me back was fear. Fear of failure, of looking absolutely ridiculous. I wasn't prepared. I didn't know my minor scales, and my pieces weren't ready. The auditions committee even gave me a handicap and let me play songs that weren't on their list of accepted works. But I took a deep breath and said a long prayer and decided to go.

I'm sure that there's a reason I love music so much. There's a reason I studied piano for eight years. I'll find a place to use it. So I told God I'd trust him to show me where that place is, and that I'd audition, and watch for his lead.

Well, I don't know how good of a truster I am because I've spent plenty of time agonizing over stuff, biting my nails, yanking my hair out. (Not literally. Way too painful).

And this past week, as I was practicing until my fingers blistered, I kept stumbling through my second song. My choir director had told me it was meant to be over the top and frilly, written during the time of absolute monarchy, meant to display the power of the king. So I kept telling myself, "I am the state! I am in control of this piano!" Only that didn't work out so well, cos I totally wasn't in control. And then I had another epiphany. I would play this song to the glory of God, not myself. After all, what have I ever done to deserve any of this? And I survived the audition! The performance was flawed and my sight-reading was a tangled mess, but apparently the interview aspect went well, and it was enough to get me in!

Anyway, that's the long and short of it. (More long than short). I feel very loved.